Hurt

I’m so hurt
To think that you are lie to me
I’m hurt
Way down deep inside of me
You said your love was true
And we’ve never, never part
Now you want some one new
And it breaks my heart

I’m hurt
Much more than you ever know
I’m so hurt
Because I still love you so
But even though you hurt me
Like nobody else who ever do
I will never ever hurt you

I’m so hurt
Much more than you ever know
I’m so hurt
Because I still love you so
But even though you hurt me
Like nobody else who ever do
I will never ever hurt you

It was my first time to hear this song, and it was sung by Bobby Vinton. If you are born in the 50s or the 60s, you wouldn’t find Bobby Vinton a stranger too. He’s the person that sings Blue on Blue, Mr Lonely, Blue Velvet, I Love How You Love Me, etc.

Why am I so into oldies? Perhaps it was influence by my aunts, uncle and parents. But don’t you realize these songs have their special meaning??

When I heard this, the lyrics sound so familiar… cuz, this happens in the real world of ours. We are hurt, because you want some one new and it breaks our hearts.

And this happens to my beloved aunt whom I’ve blogged about it before.

Apart from giving whatever support we could, what else could I do to help my aunt??

男人 MAN!

當一個男人變起心來就翻轉豬肚就是屎!
正如肥姐沈殿霞的前夫鄭少秋在欣宜幾個月大的時候, 還不是為了官晶華離開了肥姐。現在人都已經死了, 他也不送肥姐最後一程。表面上的理由是欣宜不想她的父親操勞過度。可是對我們局外人來說, 他實在無情。

男人真的那麼多心嗎? 自古以來男人就被形容是無情和負心的人。如果不是我自己親眼看到自己尊重的長輩也如此, 我想這世界上的男人也可算是百分之一百的好男人。

自從他的妻子揭發他的婚外情之後, 他盡然否認自己過錯, 反過來說是他的妻子並沒有盡妻子的責任。如果妻子的責任是提供性服務而不是為了那個家, 我想這女人要不要也沒什麼重要。就算自己的妻子沒有盡妻子的責任也不至於做丈夫的可以在外頭亂搞一團糟的權力。

做一個男人, 即承認自己犯了錯誤, 也必須覺悟和拯救自己的婚姻而不是滔滔不絕地談。這所謂的長輩甚至可以胡說八道, 也搞到家人和親戚一團糟。他盡然說是他妻子給他的壓力而搞到他自己承認這一切。他也說過, “如果Lingam 可以否認這一切, 他也可以。”

請問各位讀者可有見過這樣胡扯的男人嗎?

他也無意於悔改, 這也造成兒女們各各有神經衰弱症。他也好像不打算終止那一份情。是問這男人還是男人嗎?

男人就是頂不住那外面的誘惑, 而造成家庭破裂。自己不承認自己的過失反而責備和譴責妻子沒盡責任。因為這個緣故也造成許多的單身女性對婚姻有恐懼感。

如今我對這所謂的長輩也完完全全的沒有了那敬意。至少陳冠希有誠意嘗試對社會作個道歉, 至以這所謂的長輩, 只懂得說得天花亂墜的謊話。我真的好想看這所謂的長輩以後的日子如何過? 難道這所謂的長輩完全沒有受到良心責備嗎?

我只能奉勸各位女性不要因為一個胡扯的男人而尋找短見。反而應接受命運注定而為自己將來奮鬥。

您們說對嗎?

External Marital Affair II

I am sad, I am upset, I am down to receive a news of somebody is committing adultery since few years ago.
He’s been seeing this divorced woman for many years and this woman was divorced 2 years ago. Was it because of his involvement or what?
Nobody knows only the involve party.
It hurts the wife so much so that the wife is asking for divorce now.
What about the kids?
The kids are still small…. Yet, why would this thing happen around CNY corner?
The daughter was about to sit for her major exams this year… why can’t man just use his HEAD to think before he made such mistakes?

How would you deal with this matter when your other half admitted the fact that he had committed adultery and he’s in love with the woman that he’s still seeing? Yet, he doesn’t want to divorce?

Can you leave this and live your own life?
If the wife is an ordinary housewife, not even financial independent. Can she go thru such hurdle herself?

Truly understand divorce rate is increasing each year, and many women would ask for divorce if they found their man is cheating on them. But if this happens so sudden to you, can anyone of us handle it in a proper manner or will you jumping ups and downs?

Some will advise you to sit back and laugh at his matter, but I can tell not many can handle this matter “professionally”. Whoever involves in this matter, will start to think what have I done wrong? Do I deserve all these cheatings from my other half?

External Marital Affair

If one of these days, you got to know your husband is unfaithful to you, what would you do?
Would you ask for divorce and fight for the kids’ custody?
Would you confront him and quarrel with him?
Would you stay silent and wait till he return home?
Would you do something to make yourself more attractive and make him got attracted to you?
Would you think over what has triggered this marriage that causes him having an external marital affair?

I believe many women out there will think it over and over again, what have I done wrong that my man is straying outside of this home, right?

And, many would think I've sacrificed a lot for the man, for the family, and why is he betraying me?

We have shared so much laughter, so much happiness and tears together, not even that able to gain you back from the outside attractive world?

Or is it because other women outside will give you the pride and ego that every men needed?

I bet many of us come across many famous figures in town do have 2 wives, some of them could actually stay together for many years.
Was this fated? Or barely the man controls it all?

Some women are really lucky, the man that they married a faithful and truthful. Some are unlucky….

But, I believe a marriage built by both husband and wife, in any circumstances; husband and wife should fight against all odds to salvage it instead of letting it die quietly.

Well, this is another 5 cents worth of thoughts of mine.

My apology

I know I've not been writing anything and nothing has actually spur up my mind and mood to write.
I hope my readers could understand and give me some time to ponder what to post about.

Lately heard a lot of external marital affairs. And, with this affairs, actually caused lots of families going thru a lot of unnecessary pressure and stress.

If you come across children that under going STPM, SPM, PMR, etc. Am sure the children will be heavily affected by this matter.

Person that involves in such affair, will he or she ever thought of the consequences that affecting the family, the spouse, the kids, etc? I bet they don't. I wonder how many of these people ever know once trust is damage is hard to build back again.

Piece of advice, think twice before anyone of you STRAY around. Think of your love ones... having this external marital affair will not improve husband and wife relationship, nor family relationship.

I am not either right or wrong, but, I think this worth a 5 cents worth of value.

'Managing' marriage, friendship & family??

I don't what title should I put for this post...
After the previous post on 'Don't rush into marriage', suddenly this blog of mine has became a place for other commentors to comment.

The comments has exchanged and a bit fire up. Well, it was a positive exchange....

Like I said in my intro, am ain't a talkative person and not good in expressing myself, perhaps with that, I may indirectly say something or post something that leads others into a scenario where mistaken on certain perception.

We exchanged comments on 'managing' marriage, friendship and I add on family.
Do you all agree with us that marriage, friendship do need to be managed?

Don’t rush into marriage

I am so pleased to read this "Don't rush into marriage" by Wanita MCA chief Datuk Dr Ng Yen Yen.

There's always a pros and cons on the subject above. Especially when you're young, you can bear child easily, and by the time you're fifty years old, the children are all grown up, and less responsibilities in terms of looking after them, and so on.

If you married old, then kids are small, and your age is escalating and responsibilities become heavy too.

But what I believe, if a couple married too young, you have not really explore the outside world and not even know what is the life time commitment that you're going to face? Married young tend to be facing lots of temptations on marital affairs. Well, I may be wrong, but majority are seeing the trend of single parent increasing.

And, it ain't easy to cope with a child or children if you're single. The stress level that you're facing and tireness that you're getting, it will drive anyone crazy.

I may be wrong... however, all the above are all personal point of view....

How would you react when you hear someone announce that they are getting married

How would you react when someone announce that they are getting married?

If it is your close friend, you will definitely congratulate them and give them all the best wishes and blessings.
If it is your acquaintance, you will still congratulate them but with half hearted.

It's always a different between that... and it's very much depend on what position are you in, right?

A friend of mine told me that she's planning to get married this year end. I was happy for her and I was wondering also, first few years of marriage, you'll be having good time, the honeymoon period things like that... what about after married for few years??

Will you all quarrel over money, over in laws, over no time to spend together, etc?

When I first got married, I was kind of enjoying the honeymoon period, unfortunately the honeymoon period wasn't last long and more over due to working stress and that had lead into many arguments and quarrels.

If a couple regardless of married or not married, are not compromising or giving into another party, perhaps that will end up tragedy.

Don't you think so?

Anyway, back to my friend's wedding announcement. She was so happy and sweet over the proposal from her hubby to be, and kept the wedding ring picture in her MSN Messanger. And then, I was asking myself, ... have I ever put my hubby's picture in my wallet? Hmmm... not a single time....

Maybe... I said maybe, ... different age, different generation and different exposure.

If decent young lady first boyfriend that became the husband, honestly to me that has not been exposed enough to the outside world. Not that I encourage everyone to flirt around, but, still that is considering gaining experience, isn't it right?

hahahaha... having said that, every couple should learn how to understand each other needs, stand by each other, compromise as well.... that will definitely build a healthy marriage.

Is your marriage healthy?

I am dedicating this post to my best friend whom is now based in KL, and works in KL too.

Buddy, I know you know am referring to you! Stand up on your own and you know what to fight for.

How do you define your marriage healthy or not?
How do you define your marriage loving or not?
Is your marriage being interfere by the in-laws and you became the “out-law”?
Is your marriage being broken up by any 3rd party?
Are you neglecting your spouse at home?
Are you being neglected due to the influences from the in-law?
Is your marriage based on monetary weightage?

All the above questions pop-up after I had a word with my best friend, whom I’ve not been seeing for many years. But, we know we have each other’s thought from the bottom of our heart.

First, I got to know they were looking for me high and low, with another friend whom was our lecturer. And, because of the last minute schedules, I can’t fly down to KL to meet them for lunch.

Thus, I gave her a call. And, a call could lead to something like a marriage is at stake. One of the reason was due to the influences from the in-law and the husband is not fighting back to protect the wife, nor the children.

Am surprised to hear that and this has been going long for 6 years… I wonder how can a woman suffer silently like that without fighting back?

I always believe a woman should fight back for her own right, no matter what it takes.

Buddy, like I told you, you have done the right thing that you’re pursuing your dream and continue with strength. All of us will be here to support you. With that dream fulfilled, you will have all your ‘power’ to fight for what you supposed to have!!

And I always believe in you could do so.

An in-law like that, honestly, doesn’t earn a single penny of respect!!!
Where in the world could simply blamed for a visit to their daughter-in-law’s family that led to a robbery at home?
Doesn’t that sound funny??
I believe there are many ‘pantang-larang’ in Malaysia and even in certain generation. But, an in-law like them, well educated and well brought up and wealthy could accused the daughter-in-law for that matter, honestly, these in-law doesn’t earn a single respect from anyone!

Let’s talk about the husband? Doesn’t the husband stand up and tell the mother that, “Mom, my wife did nothing wrong and she ain’t that kind of person.”

Why the husband is not standing up and protect the wife??
What has the husband done so far??
Hiding behind the mommy’s back??
That sounded like ‘no balls’, isn’t it?

Sorry to be rude. But a woman could eat up all these silently all these years, the husband earn no respect from others as well.

Well, buddy… stay firm, stay strong, be happy, have faith in yourself. You can do and you could do better than this!!!

Luv ya.

Do you all fight with your spouce?

It was meant to be another boring, quiet, peaceful Saturday. But, my husband and I ended up with a minor arguement over a holiday which we have planned.
Then now am thinking, how many couple in the world always fight, argue, quarrel?

All these years, since courting till we got married, we hardly fight. Ya, no doubt about it that we always argue over some minor matters, but come to think of it, we hardly hardly fight.

Fight in a sense that anything we can shout over it. And follow by a cold war things like that....

Has anyone out there come across couple fight and waiting for another one to say sorry??