Monday, May 19, 2008


Mother In Law – with this title there are many to talk about. Good and bad! Ups and downs! Kind and cruel! Thoughtful and selfish! And many more…

I supposed a thoughtful mother-in-law will create the harmony in the family and the family tie as well. If one is not that thoughtful and understanding, perhaps, the family tie is rather weak.

I personally experience this and though I post it out, and I know many will ask you to forgive and forget. But how many could do it, when the damage has already done?

It’s always say easy then done! No doubt about this statement.

When a person creates the ‘mis-understanding’ among each children and each of them will have the doubtful in them, I supposed there’s no closeness among the siblings.

I truly understand the kids will believe what their mother said, cuz, this is their mother. And, of course, they will pin point on other party’s wrong doing. But, did anyone of them realize or even investigate who created the ‘mis-understanding’ when thing crops up?

I bet none of them did that. Thus, the innocent party will keep receiving the blames, and scolding, and everything bad. However, the mother will get all the credits.

One good example, if the children kept saying the parents are old, let them do what they like. Well, I have no question about this. BUT, if one parent is weak and advisable for not moving a lot, should they consider to advise the parents to stay put in one place instead of staying one night here and one night there?

This is what all manufacturers called it ‘preventive’.

This happened during Chinese New Year, when the mother fell down. Things happened in a way that the father wants to have breakfast in up town where else the parents are living in down town. Reason for the father to have breakfast in up town is because the father wants to see how things going in the daughter’s house, as the daughter was moving house at that time.

The mother was blaming father was not looking after her properly thus she fell down, thus, father was blaming mother for going up town for breakfast, thus she fell down. When this happened, the involved parties were pushing the blame here and there, and yet the children do not realize this could be minimized if they could minimize their movements.

Then after, the son gotta rush the mother to the emergency ward, and doctor advised to give her a jap that costs RM5k. Well, money isn’t any matter to us, cuz, this is mother. Mother injured, each of us will have to do our part. However, mind you, this happened few days before Chinese New Year. Everyone knows when comes to such festival, each family will have quite a sumptuous spendings. Well, the sons have no other choice but to give her the jab. And on top of that my husband gave her quite a bit amount of money for new year as well.

My heart sunken when my mother-in-law said the amount was too little for her. And that has created 1 ‘mis-understanding’ between the other siblings and my husband.

Other ‘mis-understanding’ was the recent case where we celebrated Mother’s Day. Her daughter accusing us for not visiting my mother-in-law and blaming us for not taking care of the mother and so on.

Of which, hubby went back and see his mother 2 weeks ago. And yet, his own mother did not defend her son, but allowing the daughter accusing the brother and blaming the brother for no reason.

That was hurt to me and my husband.

Other ‘mis-understanding’ are many years ago, which she always complained to the other children that I do not care for them. I was so hurt, cuz, among the daughters-in-law, I was the one that cooked for her when she was unwell and I was the one that invited her for lunch and dinner or even I cooked and invited them to my house for meal.

What I have today was all the ‘mis-understandings’ that I have, all the ‘damages’ that I have.

Like I say, don’t the children believe the mother and father blindly without studying the truth?

I have been having this ‘damage’ for 7 years. And it burst out yesterday.

No comments: