While I was trying hard to forget March 21, 2008, Friday happenings.
Somebody had reminded me how I looked like when I was expecting my first child. Commented that I was over restricting myself for not taking certain food that causes my face looked pale. Added to that, ‘that’s why from the scan, your baby looks ok, but a lot of people said that you do not look good’.
Was it my fault for losing my baby?
Why would this people reminded me of my scar?
Wasn’t it a mother’s instinct to protect the unborn child by not eating certain food that may potentially harm the foetus?
Does it mean by doing so, it doesn’t proven the baby after born will be stronger and healthier but could be weaker?
I thought I had buried the pain safely down deep in my heart. With that reminder, I was actually sobbing down here at my working desk. Till I can’t control it further, I walked to the washroom and locked myself and cried.
Nobody could understand the pain that constraint in me… and, nobody could understand the pain that we went thru.
This is the only corner that I can cry out loud.
I don’t need any sympathy… but need not to remind me of that scar.
blueks
12 years ago
3 comments:
omg!! who's tat evil person?? i hope it's not me!!
dun be sad. some ppl jus being too sarcastic and nv tot of others feeling..
well, as i mentioned, it's not ur fault for losing ur baby. it all depend on FATE, dear. dun take it so seriously. i kno it's quite hard for u to forget the unhappy things. but try ya.
think positive too. mayb the 'somebody' jus concerned abt u but then she/he dunno how to express herself quite well. as a pregnant lady, there's lotsa things hv to b controlled too instead of food onli.. jus hv to make sure u eat healthy ya.. :)
i kno how u're so hurt deep within ur heart. if u dun mind, u can share ur problems wif me too. but pls dun make urself so sad ya. u can cry it out. cos crying is good for u to release ur tension. i alwis cry over some small things too.. :) well, as my hubby said, women's tears is the best weapon to release tension and i agreed to him! :)
if u stil cant control ur sadness, try to drop by at my comics -> http://piggycomic.blogspot.com :) hope it wil bring laughter to u ya :) dun b sad dear. god wil alwis be there for u :) and i alwis wil :)
You know what. Ppl commented that I look weird in my previous pregnancy. My nose turned huge, and so on...
Now, on and off, my eldest sister and mother remind me for not doing things that I'm not suppose to do when I'm pregnant again. I didn't tell you that my water broke after I pump water at the sink in my bathroom. I tried to not be superstitious, but now I know prevention is better than cure. No matter what ppl are talking about, I'll stick to this principle.
Hi Liangmui, thank you very much of your sweet thought.
Hi Little Inbox, your nose turned huge, it's not your problem, it's the hormone in us that making these changes. I would only take these people have no medical general knowledge. Even so, individual pregnancy has its own individual symtoms.
I truly agree with you... prevention is always better than cure!!! However, not many people believe in 'PREVENTION'. Perhaps these people are one of the lucky one hence, they do not believe in this word.
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